Buying Your Ticket for the Pity Train

removing self doubt on the pity trainIf you check the date of this post and then glance at the previous post, you will notice it has been over a month since my last post. Since then I spent the majority of December trying to quit my online quest, I rediscovered my ticket for the pity train and was not getting off until my destination was reached.

This is a kinda funny admission from a blog about positive thinking!

The problem with the pity train is that it is a very comfortable place to be and the longer you stay on it the harder it will be to finally rip up your ticket and never return. Of course there will still be moments of doubt but by having a clear goal and engaging with others that believe in your mission, you will ensure you never need to return.

So what made the difference for me?

The goal I have is very clear, I want to help you to begin developing a life you can be proud of.

That means helping you to get off the pity train and make rapid, consistent progress towards your goals and that perfect day.

This is my passion and lets be clear I am not the big success I want to be but most of my friends know that whatever the situation I can normally remain positive when others will focus on the bleak.

When I started seriously online in 2010, yes there was 4 years of running eBay and Amazon stores then when I lost my contract in 2010, I spent a month without sleep hitting every shiny button until i finally accepted that I could not do this on my own.

One message that stuck with me from that phase is that you should never have a backup plan.

But lets be clear a backup plan is different from an alternative path which is about getting to the same destination via an alternative route.

The backup plan is where you quit this quest, return to the life you are trying to escape from whilst hoping for some miracle to make a difference in your life.

I did not then and still do not have a backup plan, you should appreciate like I do, that life is too short to wait for miracles.

So without a backup plan I had to leave the train in the middle of nowhere and look at my landscape for paths to my perfect life.

Two days prior to Christmas day my great friend, Phil Henderson offered me a training package that matched my vision of a perfect day thus as I sat alone in my rented room on Christmas day, I spent the day studying that training package.

Why did I get that message from Phil, because I had spent the time to engage with Phil and others that share my vision of helping others.

This is the one of the key elements to ensuring you leave the pity train, engage with others whenever  you can. Another is, as my friend Jo Barnes recommends, never rate your life against that of others. They have a different vision of a perfect day and thus if you use them as your yard stick then you will move further away from your perfect day.

Today, create that perfect day vision and from now on only measure your progress by how close that day is.

Photo of igor Griffiths

So what's your excuse again?

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  1. Hi igor,

    I did think of you on Christmas day, having known your situation I felt for you mate and did have a little think about what you’d be doing.

    Removing self doubt is a must. I’ve suffered it and it really did hold me back for an age. Once we overcome it we can move forward and often look back wondering what all the fuss was about.

    Self pity is something else that I’ve had to deal with. During my time studying the Masterclass I had an operation that should’ve took just 2 weeks to recover from…… but me? 2 weeks? nah it took 8 months to recover mate and during that time I was laid in bed every single day. I could only sit up for an hour at the most and the rest of the time was laid on my side, rotating from left to right.

    I watch my fellow students growing and couldn’t help but feel some self pity, but I still kept the dream alive and when i did have the hour sat up I would write a post, or part of one, and just try to keep my blog updated.

    When i was able to get up and get back at it my mum had a serious health scare and was at deaths door for some time. As she was recovering i was by her side each and every day and put everything on hold. I got so far behind that I did think about giving it all up, when I told my wife what I was thinking she put her foot down and told me “Oh no you’re F’ ing not. You haven’t worked that hard to pack it in now”

    and it was that comment that gave me a kick up the R Send and made me snap out of it.

    I’m so grateful to my wife for that comment as without it I wouldn’t have achieve all that I have.

    Fair play to Phil for helping you out igor, I love this community and the way we all support each other.

    All the very best to you igor, remember where I am if you ever need me mate 😉

    Barry Wells recently posted..What Would You Like To Achieve This Year?My Profile

    1. Thanks Barry what a great comment and it comes at a perfect moment as my latest post addresses one of my and perhaps others biggest internal struggles. So glad you have a strong lady ensuring you stay on track and in a positive frame of mind. My ex took the other route to convince me that my role in society would always be one of failure, gonna so prove her wrong.

      You have overcome so much and the more I discover about you the more you amaze me, looking forwards to the surprises you have in store for 2012

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